Puts Things Into Perspective

When we receive bad news of a loved one or a dear friend who has passed away it really does puts things into perspective and makes you really look at life and the situations.

Having the news we had yesterday, regarding Deans Granddad (papa), as well as thinking of my babe and giving him all the support that he needs at this sad time I have been thinking of where we have been and where we are going.

Dean never saw his papa for over 4 years due to a fall out and I feel for Dean and I know he is hurting inside, but when you’re in a situation and like families do fall out, you don’t think that you may or may not see them again and nothing in the world will or can change paths of life.

Dean like me has a strained relationship with his family and I have never stopped Dean seeing his family it’s his choice alone and I’ve supported it and respected it, like it’s my choice alone that I don’t see my family and I have chosen to cut all ties with my father because he has not been there for me ever and when he was it was on his terms so he had the chance he blew it on a few occasions and for that reason I don’t see him, I pass him by in the street and in the pubs regular as if he was a stranger, Yes I have his name but what’s a name these days.

It’s the same old saying it one thing calling yourself a father but it’s another thing being one, I have my step dad and my mother to thank for my upbringing and I very thankful for the upbringing they both gave me because I am who I am now thanks to the way they brought me up, and some say I am like them sometimes as I can be stubborn but I don’t see it myself, I do regret some of my actions over the years and I have to live with them, but I can’t turn back time.

The hardest thing is thinking you may not see people again and that can be very hard to digest, I would love to turn back time and have my time with my mum again but I can’t, but I am lucky in a way I was there for her final years, months, days and hours, and for her final journey.

But Dean still has a mother and father, and people always say you can have many dads (I don’t believe that) but you have only 1 mum and that I do believe in, who for various reasons Dean doesn’t have contact with them, which when it comes to your parents it’s sad that you fall out for 1 reason or another.

Live is a like a rollercoaster up and down, and you will fall off at stages and try to get back on, sometimes you will get straight back on and sometimes it will be hard to get back on, but you will fall off and not get back on again!!!

But that’s how we learn and understand things and it’s part of our growing up, I am lucky to have been brought up with respect and to respect others and their feelings but like everything in life it’s not always that simple.

And you have to make important decisions in life and take measures in life that may and will effect, anger and upset others around you, Take us moving away, we couldn’t have continued where we was because of events beyond our control and of not our doing that happened in the months before Christmas, if we hadn’t taken that big step to move away, and it wasn’t a decision taken lightly but we hadn’t god knows what would have happened.

You can’t live your life to please others or live it around people or through other people’s lives; you have to take actions and be responsible for them and take the stress and flack that will bring.

Some people think that everyone who smiles and laughs has the perfect life, but how wrong these people can be, we would all like to live in the prefect world but we don’t.

It’s sad that it sometimes takes a death to make you look at your lives in a new light, but for the love in the world we can’t turn back time and start over again, we can only hope that one day bridges can be built so we can all walk over them together and in harmony.

What I am trying to say is life is far too short and to predictable to let it pass you by and then have regrets later in your own life because you have missed someone else’s life, so try and if possible make time for the loved ones in your life and hold on to that love has it can be taken away at anytime.

I have had my time with some of the people who I cared about and loved very much but most of them have now passed on, but if you haven’t had this and you can have it then crab it with both hands before it passes you by again and for the final time

I have always supported Dean with his choice and I respect his decisions and I will continue to support him whatever he chooses now and later in time, because that’s what you do when you love each other, like he has supported my choice and respected my decisions.

So If your reading this and have loved ones who you don’t see for 1 reason or another and if it’s possible for you to have time with them then do it now before it’s too late.

Wayne

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